THE STEAK DINNER- FROM HELL

(names have been changed to protect the innocent and guilty)

The year 1988.   The place – Bonanza (Grand forks)

My two friends “Dale + Hugh” and myself were on a weekend trip to good old Grand forks. It was decided that one evening we were going to go out for dinner and then to a local bar in town. I should start off by saying that me and my buddies went to the USA quite often together. Usually two of us would gang up on the other one, we took turns kinda like survivor- making alliances and usually breaking them. This time it was Hugh’s turn to be abused. He had gotten himself all dressed up cowboy style to go out for the night. We got to the restaurant sat down and placed our orders, Hugh ordering a big steak dinner.  Hugh got up from the table to use the washroom just as dinner was brought to the table. Seeing he wasn’t there to protect his meal we took this opportunity to remove his baked potato and bun off his plate, drop them on the floor and kick them around to each other. We salted up his steak as well as his drink for good measure. He came back from the washroom just as we were finishing up. He sat down and reached for the HP steak sauce. He then started to shake the bottle to mix up the sauce. He looked at us and said “what are you two idiots smiling about”. Just at that moment the cap from the bottle of Hp sauce popped off. This was not planned. Having not noticed that the cap had come off he continued to shake the bottle drenching himself in HP. We could do nothing but sit and watch as this seemed to happen in slow motion. By the time he caught on his white Roy Rodgers shirt was HP brown. As we were smiling before the cap came off he assumed we loosened it. He called us assholes and went back to the can to wash up. We were still laughing when he came back to the table and ate his steak dinner from hell without saying a word.  We had to drive all the way back to the hotel so he could change his clothes but it was worth it. He was asked numerous times that weekend “hey do you want some HP with that”

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A FISTFUL OF STEAK